Farrington-Gores: Fight Club

‘So this is the club.’

‘Through this door is all staff and fighters only, but down here is where it all goes on.’

‘I’m taking bets on how long it’ll be before Eli lands himself back in hospital.’

‘Oh, that’s mean! ...But it probably won’t be all that long, if I’m honest.’

‘Yeah, most people’re expecting him to be back in traction within a week, tops.’

‘Poor Eli.’

‘What d’you expect? Someone who drunkenly rides a fucking pool lilo down a flight of stairs isn’t exactly known for critical thinking, for fuck’s sake.’

‘Yeah, well, critical thinking ain’t his strong suit. This is Jude, by the way.’

‘That’s exactly my point.’

‘Hi, nice to meet you. I’m Penelope, and this is Robin.’

‘Hi, guys.’

‘Pen helps me run the place, and Robin’s another fighter.’

‘Hi.’

‘That’s right! So, what can I do for you?’

‘I’m showing her around the place. She’s got her first match tonight.’

‘Ahh, I see! Well, good luck with it.’

‘Thanks. I’m not really sure what to expect.’

‘Nothing to worry about. There’s check-ups after each bout, especially if you lose. Get in there, fling yourself at the other person, knock ‘em out, you win.’

‘Preferably not with literal flinging, though.’

‘If it works…!’

‘She might, she’s got a wrestling background.’

‘I think I’ll have to adapt my moveset a bit, though. But thanks.’

‘Either way, you should get into the swing of things pretty easily, everybody else has. Even grumpy-face over here managed it.’

‘...Thanks, Pen.’

‘Everyone here’s pretty decent. Though some of the punters can be arseholes. Just ignore ‘em if they start talking shit.’

‘Indeed. Anyway, do you have any questions?’

‘Umm… What’s upstairs?’

‘Locker rooms. Gender segregated, obviously. I’m sure Pen can show you the ladies’.’

‘Yes, I can do that.’

‘Sex segregated.’

‘Yeah, you’re right. I ain’t used to saying sex. Not like that, anyway.’

‘No, it’s not really a frequently used word in your vocabulary full stop, is it?’

‘Unlike some of the others.’

‘Especially after a few drinks! Do you consider that better or worse than lilo riding?’

‘Hmm… At least Eli being a dumbass gives me something to laugh at. And rip the piss out of him for, so I’ll say I prefer that.’

‘Me too. Anyway, there’s also our offices and a little gym room just for warming up. That’s about it. Oh, wait. You need a theme song.’

‘I’ve always been a fan of Diamond Eyes by Shinedown.’

‘Right, then I’ll tell the crew that later. Pretty sure nobody else uses that one, so you should be good.’

Later that night...

‘Hey. You up next?’

‘Yeah, I am. Did you win?’

‘Yup. Good luck.’

‘Nice one. And thanks. I like your tats, by the way.’

‘Oh, thanks. You nervous?’

‘A bit. I haven’t done much performing.’

‘The nervousness goes away once you’re actually in there. At least, it did for me. No surprise though, hard to be nervous when someone’s trying to punch your lights out.’